Saturday, May 31

the truth, the whole truth & nothing but the truth

Ever really wanted to say something to someone but worry about how they'd react or how it might change your relationship? I've been thinking about this a lot recently! I think I've said this before on my blog, but it's worth repeating.

Not to brag or sound high on myself, but I have lots of friends, around the world! I have never sat down & listed them from top to bottom in order of importance, but I know who the important ones are. But I still wonder where I stand in their eyes. I say this because when I know I'm going to be near them, we start to make plans, then as the time gets closer I get this impending feeling like the meeting we've set up just isn't going to happen, then when the time comes as I worried the meeting falls through. They always apologise for not being able to make it to see me, but what I really want to say is, "I've just flown over 3,000 miles, hired a car, driven another 200 miles, and all you can say is sorry? Really if you were a true friend who really cared, you make more of an effort! I'm okay if you don't want to be friends with me anymore, I've got lots, just don't bother with all the lip service in the first place." This is also true of all those friends who swore up and down that they would come and visit me whilst I've been living over in London - a place to say and a tour guide to help you get around London for FREE, how can you pass that up?

I can list on one hand the number of people (dad, mom, Patty & Matt (they count as one), my cousin Tim, and my "brother" Mike) who have come to visit. This really makes me sad, actually it really pisses me off! To add more salt to this wound, my "brother" Mike introduced me to his best mate's family (Neala & Ben - who I spent Easter with this year) who all live in Germany. Neala in turn introduced me to her best mate Melissa & her family. This August Neala & Melissa are coming to visit me - ya know cause that's what friends do. I understand it's easier for them to fly over from Germany, but hello if you keep an eye on the airlines there are always good deals popping up for direct flights from Montreal, NYC (JFK or Newark), Boston, DC, etc. Corinne (my mate since 5th grade) is coming to visit in August & if she can't get cheap flights here I'm going to meet up with her somewhere else in Europe. Again if you don't want to fly to London let me know - I'm willing to travel to Europe to see you - that's what my sis & I keep talking about. So what is every one's excuse for not coming to visit?

MORE SO, what is their excuse for not seeing me when I'm home? No, wait, I get it, you just don't care enough! Don't give me some half arse reply like, "we didn't have time" YOU MAKE TIME for the things you want to do & the people you want to see! My real friends have done it for the past 3 years I've lived abroad, how come you can't?

"If you could say one thing to me without any consequences what would you say? Think about it . . . and say everything you feel, think and want cause life is short!" - unknown quote I really think fits in with this post!

Feel free to leave an anonymous comment especially if you think you have any insight into what I'm talking about.

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posted by Sara @ 3:28 pm 9 comments